Why My Cat Won’t Attend Meetings

It was part of her job – to attend meetings held without an agenda. Now, after attending a few, she refuses to attend. Here’s why.

 

1) No one asks her to help.

 

Olivia always comes prepared to be part of the action. She puts on her best fur, fluffs up her whiskers, and sharpens her claws. But people treat her as if she’s just a cute little pet. Sometimes they don’t even notice her when she enters the room. As you might expect, she gets mad when people ignore her. So she takes a nap.

 

2) It’s difficult to nap.

 

Usually, only a few people talk. But they use loud voices. While this seems to scare the other attendees into silence, it still makes it hard to sleep. She especially dislikes jokes because they cause an outburst of laughter, and that jolts her awake. Certainly, no one likes to be awakened by a loud noise.

 

3) They don’t take breaks.

 

Olivia detests lengthy marathon meetings that go on and on without a break. She wonders if any of the people in these meetings were ever shown how to care for their basic comfort. When I suggested that she ask them to set up a litter box, Olivia curtly told me that she prefers a little privacy.

 

4) The attendees behave like mice.

 

Every cat knows that if you want to catch something, you have to watch it. But people in meetings have an attention span that would embarrass a mouse. They dart and dash about, nibbling on everything without focusing on anything. It makes her nervous to watch them.

 

5) They drop what they catch.

 

Cats know that once you catch something, you bring it home. After all, that’s why you caught it. But people drop an idea and rush off to talk about something else. They don’t even play with it. Olivia wonders if they know they caught something.

 

By the way, what are your meetings like?